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|“||אױ װײ (oy vey)||”|
|“||If you want a French girlfriend, you can always go to Vichy.
- Shosanna Dreyfuss ( Inglorious Basterds )
Israelcube, officially the State of
Jewistan Israelcube is a countrycube located in the Levant, Middle East and Western Asia. He is border with Lebanonball to the north, Syriaball to the north east, Jordanball to the east, Egyptball and Worst enemy Palestineball to the east and west, respectively, but it still has access to the southeastern shore of the Mediterranean Sea and Northern shore of the Red Sea. He is also the only country that has a Jewish majority in the world, and he was born in 1948 from a mix of EUball, African Unionball, Soviet Unionball, and a few other Kebabs in Middle East. Israel hate when people call him "Russian Arab" and all of the stereotypes against him: Playing the violin, controlling the world
, Being Rich, Having a big nose, Being a desert, Being a shape shifting alien
There are some countries (32 in total) that do not recognize the cube, such as not accepting their passports. There are also countryballs that want him gone for what they officially describe as "resistance".
The appearance of Israel as a cube is because of Jewish physics. If someone asks why Israel is a cube, the proper thing to do is respond with, in all caps: "JEWISH PHYSICS". Israel can into Baseball, and he played very well at the World Baseball Classic.
They become independent for a time and split into Kingdom of Judahcube and Kingdom of Israelcube, but they both were conquered by SPQRball who brought in their theaters, architecture and rationalism. That clay was known as Judah ever since 733 BC and Judea is the Greek/Roman adaptation.
In response to SPQRball influences there were a lot of preachers who tried to get Jewcubes to return to the ways of the past: Sadducees, Pharisees, Essenes, Zealots and one who didn't fit into any of those groups, Jesus of Nazareth.
He spread is message of peace, love and above all justice, and he was said to perform miracles. His message was radical in this anti-authoritarian stance stating that the last will be the first and the first will be the last. All of which drove SPQRball to arrest and execute Jesus through crucifixion.
In 66 AD Jewcubes launched a revolt against SPQRball that ended in 73 AD as a failure and SPQRball expelled Jewcubes from Judea throught the continent. Without geographic unity Jewcubes had to solidify what it meant to be Jewcube in the basic tennents of Judaism.
After Seljukball took Anatolia and invaded the Levant, Byzantineball called for the western countries to fight Seljukball, but the west had the idea of taking the holy land. This is where the crusades camem, with the first leading to the creation of A christian Jerusalemball. After many crusades against the Seljuks, Ayyubids, and Fatimids however, Kingdom of Jerusalemball would be eventually crused by Mamlukball's wrath. By the 1500s the region had been conquered by Ottomanball.
Jewcubes were persecuted all over Europe, this led to the creation of a Zionist movement in 1896 that advocated for the creation of a sovereign Jewcube state in unpopulated places in Africa, however the movement had no success.
Thus Jewcubes mass immigrated in Palestine and legally bought lands. However the native Arabballs ( Palestineball) saw this as european colonialism (little did they know, they were already a colony) and conflicts began.
Due to growing anti-semitism and Nazi Germanyball in Europe, Jewcubes started to immigrate to Mandante of Jewish Palestinecube in even larger numbers, this led to even more conflict between Jewcubes and Arabballs ( Palestineball).
And sparked the Arabballs ( Palestineball) revolt of 1936-39 against UKball's rule in Mandante of Jewish Palestinecube, commiting acts of violence, seen as what allowed the Jewcubes immigration. The revolt was crushed but UKball limited Jewcubes immigrations to Mandante of Jewish Palestinecube.
After lots of ethnical clashes it became clear that Jewcubes and Arabballs ( Palestineball) could not co-exist peacefully so UKball left Mandante of Jewish Palestinecube to UNball who in 1948 proposed a partition plan where they would split Palestine 50/50, Jewcubes agreed and Israelcube was born, finally becoming an independent nation.
But Arabballs ( Palestineball) refused and a day later Israelcube was attacked by Iraqball, Syriaball, Egyptball and Jordanball with the support of the Arab Leagueball, starting the 1948 Arab-Israeli War. Against all odds, the newborn nation Israelcube won and annexed most clay in Palestine except for Gazaball that was under the control of Egyptball and West Bankball that was under the control of Jordanball. A mass exodus of Palestinians occurred, with many fleeing to neighboring Arab nations.
In 1956, Israel, with help from UKball and Franceball, attacked the Sinai Peninsula, forcing Egyptball to demilitarize the area. However, they later moved their military back in just before the Six-Day War.
In 1966 due to struggles over their homeland Arabballs in Palestine (who during the nationalist movements in middle east identified themselves as Jordanballs) started growing a sense of nationalism and identified themselves as something more than just Arabballs, thus Palestineball was born.
The next year in 1967, Six-Day War occured, in which Israel attacked Iraqball, Syriaball, Jordanball, Lebanonball and Egyptball and won in six days. It was a victory so great that Sabaton made = w_N7PSkwUmA a song about it. Israelcube took over Golan Heightsball from Syriaball, West Bankball from Jordanball, Gazaball and Sinai Peninsulaball from Egyptball. Israel and Egypt began fighting the War of Attrition soon after, which continued until 1970.
In 1970, Palestineball attacked Jordanball (Black September in Jordan), Israelcube and Lebanonball (Palestinian insurgency in Southern Lebanonball). In 1972, a group of Palestineballs known as the Black September Organization held the Israeli Olympic team hostage in Munichball and massacred all of them. In response to this, the Mossad started Operation Wrath of God to kill all of those involved.
In 1973, Yom Kippur War occurred, in which Arabballs launched a surprise attack on Israelcube, but lost again. The same year, Israel launched several attacks against the PLO (Palestinian Liberation Organization) in Southern Lebanon. In 1976, Ugandaball helped terrorists hold a plane full of Israelis hostage, resulting in an Israeli attack, during which the Israeli military deployed several planes carrying armored personnel carriers and soldiers, which killed the terrorists, Ugandan soldiers, and destroyed several Ugandan fighter jets.
In 1978, Israelcube finally agreed to peace with Egyptball and gave Sinai Peninsulaball back in return during the Camp David accords. That same year, Israel attacked southern Lebanonball, resulting in a PLO retreat. In 1982, Israel launched a full attack on Lebanonball, resulting in the complete expulsion of the PLO. This invasion ended in 1985, but marked the beginning of the South Lebanon conflict, a war which continued until the Israeli withdrawal in 2000. In 1985, in response to the murder of 3 Israelis on their yacht in Cyprusball, Israel destroyed the PLO headquarters in Tunisiaball with fighter jets.
While all of this was happening, large numbers of Israelis started illegally settling in the West Bank, forcing Palestinians off of their land and generally making it harder for Israel and Palestine to agree to peace. Anger over all of this erupted into the First Intifada, which began as a series of protests and boycotts, but soon erupted into violence in the form of riots and terrorist attacks. The first intifada ran from 1987 to 1993. In 1993, the Oslo accords were negotiated, resulting in the formation of Palestineball's official government. However, both Israeli extremists and Palestinian extremists used violence in an attempt to derail these agreements. Hamas organized bombings and the Israeli prime minister was assassinated by a far-right Israeli. Israel made peace with Jordanball in 1994.
Israel launched Operation Grapes of Wrath in 1996 to stop rocket attacks by Hezbollah through extensive air raids and shelling. A second summit at Camp David was held in 2000 for further peace talks, but nothing came up. Palestinians, believing that peace would not be achieved due to this, began the Second Intifada, which was way more violent and bloody than than the first. Israel attempted to suppress these uprisings, but the violence was too widespread to simply suppress with force. This largely ended after the Sharm El Sheik summit in 2005, where both sides agreed to stop attacking eachother. As part of the agreement, Israel disengaged from (left) the Gaza strip the same year, both militarily and civilly.
In 2006, Palestine held elections, which were a victory for Hamas. A year later in June 2007, Hamas took over Gazaball through military force and expelled Fatah (The other major party in Palestine). In response, the Fatah-aligned president dissolved Palestineball's unitary government, which had been formed earlier that year, and established an emergency government. Hamas used its new control over Gaza to launch more violent attacks against Israel. In response to this, Israel supplied the emergency government with weapons and put Gazaball under a strict blockade with help from Egyptball, depriving the civilian population of goods and infrastructure. Many tunnel networks exist in attempts to supply civilian goods and animals, but some also exist to provide shelter/resources for Hamas's violent campaigns. Hamas and Fatah were able to form another unitary government in 2014, but that also fell apart due to Operation Protective Edge and other events in Gaza.
Also In 2006, Hezbollah fired rockets at Israeli towns as a distraction as they ambushed 2 Israeli humvees with anti-tank guns, killing 3 soldiers, before taking 2 hostage. Israel responded with Airstrikes and shellings, both on military assets and civilian infrastructure. Various other wars, skirmishes, and operations happened in the following years, such as Operation Summer Rains in 2006, Operation Cast Lead in 2008, Operation Pillar of Defense in 2012, Operation Protective Edge in 2014, and an unnamed conflict in 2021. In 2008, Israelcube offered Palestineball to be a state, but he rejected the offer because he did not get all the clay in the West Bank. In time Israelcube and Palestineball got tired of looking for any solution for peace. Nowadays they are not trying to solve the conflict anymore, just to manage it.
Relationships (קשרי גומלין/kishrei gommlin)
- USAball - Best friend. Gib weapons, and don't forget some shekels. Me return Technology, Medicine and Gunz. Also America, pls no gib information of classified to Russiaball. That information was only for sharings between you, me, and all of the allies. He doesn't recognize Palestineball.
But Cheeseburger Is not kosher ok?!
- Azerbaijanball - Anyone who dislikes Iranball is a friend of mine!, even if kebab themselves. take dat nuclear Iranball!!! Best kebab friend. Keep buying my guns please.
- Dominican Republicball - He is of good friend he helped my people during World War II. His president visited me in 2009.
- South Sudanball - He recognizes me. However he also recognizes that fake country...
( Reichtangle of Merkel)- Apology accepted and he doesn't recognize Palestineball. BUT REMEMBER ZE HOLOCAUST! 1933 through 1945, WORST YEARS OF MY LIFE! Sorry my friend.
- Sudanball - New Friend. He is probably a weird guy, but he is nice so i'll spare him.
- North Sulawesiball - He has most populated jewish but he is part of provinces that Bad Father.
- - But my dad's not a bad fath-
- Somalilandball - I am considering recognizing you again, and you are a good country unlike your anti-semitic pirateheaded claimant.
- Kosovoball - Both recently have exchanged recognitions.
- Ashkenazi - Jewish friends in Europe
- UAEball - Thanks for recognizing me cool kebab guy! my peeps go to Dubai on vacation! We both hate Idiot.
- Bahrainball - Thanks for recognizing me, Your jewish minority got more freedom in your clay and we both hate this scum.
- Franceball - She helps me remove kebabs, also nice bread!
- Italyball, Spainball and Portugalball - Doesn't recognize Palestineball but you try to hate me because i putting some apple's his pizza. (For now atleast)
- Netherlandsball - Gave me money and weapons during Six-Day War against Egyptball, Syriaball and Jordanball, now big supports and friend of me as well and does not recognizing Palestineball but has heard of him but all of his children hates me.
- Switzerlandball - Thank you for saving of Jews from World War II and it was of best thing you stayed neutral that no one attackings of you. Also you don't recognize Palestineball But why do you support him neutrally?!?
- Canucks - good mate. Not sure if kebab remover because of ISISball or still weakling. Great job with that shot! removing ISIS from 3km is impressive, teach me master! He aso doesn't recognize Palestineball (in general).
- Jewish Autonomous Oblastcube - Fellow Jewcube From Russia, but practices Eastern Orthodoxy not very kosher.
- Tringapore - Helped build and train his armed forces in the art of Kebab removal ( his neighbours are Kebabs and out to Anschlussing him).
- Bulgariaball - Bulgaria accepts Jews filming on his clay! Also, they both hates the evel Nazis!
- Polandball - Both us Jews. Stronkest ally. = pVYD6xcDkR8 Dependant on me for their buses.
- South Koreaball - Good military trading partners. We use a lot of Korean electronics in our sophisticated weapons! I fought its evil brother during the Yom-Kippur War.
- Japanball - Anime! er, um, Yuo recognize me.
- Cameroonball - Don't recognize Palestineball and support me a lot, I help its too, is also my best African friend.
- Philippinesball - OP GREAT CLOSE FRIEND! Provided safe refuge for several Jews during World War II. We were close friends since the beginning! I is of its first friend and still is! I gib its new weapons and equipment to fight that Dumb bully. Remember the time we used to hang out back in the ancient times? Yuor father proposed to be engaged with me. But why do you recognize fake country!?
- Czechiaball - Gib a lot of weapons when born, now big supports and friend of me!
- Indiaball - Helpings of him in removing Urdu kebab and sellings Hitech weapons (plox) to him, and "Tarnegól Hódu/India Chicken" also Hebrew name for turkey (bird), and I have big psychedelic trance scene based on his own, but he do not supportings of me in public and recognizes Palestine :(
- Sri Lankaball - Helped Sri Lankaball in removing terrorists, including training, fighter jets, and attack boats but recognizes Palestineball!
- Guatemalaball - I moved its embassy to Jerusalem. But stop being friend with Palestineball.
- Palauball, Micronesiaball and Marshall Islandsball - Consistent UN Supporters.They also Don't recognize Palestineball!
- Eritreaball - Despite his insanity, he is the only horn African I can trust. I have a lot of my military equipment in his clay stationed. I protect him against terrorists and Somali Pirates, Though sometimes he can be kind of scary because he is a psychopath.
- Bhutanball - Yuo have established relations with me, so we are into friendship now.
- Moroccoball - Quite neutral, he warned me about an incoming war (Six-Day War), and he recognizes me now. We both hate Iranball and Algeriaball.
- Vietnamball - Although he be friend with Palestine, but he likes my weapons. We suffered painful memories from the our enemies. We defeated the invaders by guerilla warfare.
- Ukraineball - I want to help you but i'm scared of Russiaball, That dude is freaking crazy. You are a nice kid so i'll send you some humanitarian aid.
- West Papuaball - It people loves me also i'll hide you from Crazy guy who doesn't recognize me
- UKball - We was of enemies before he tried limting jewish immigration and when I got independence he wanted to intervene in my war with Arabs in 1948 but now we are on good terms. He had jewish many jewish volunteers in WW1 but dont recognize Palestine!
- Turkeyball - We were good friends until 2010 when a ship disaster happened and we cut our relations. But now we secretly are in reconciliation. But 2015 rapprochement and apologizes bringing us both together of mutual stances in the world as well as thankful for being warned of terrorist attack getting back on track. But not just yet. Yuo also have horrible minority with ugly flags and invalid reasons for independence like us so we understand each other.
- Ethiopiaball - My cousin from the Horn of Africa (don´t believe me? Remember Solomon and Sheba?). We had to cut ties in 1979 in his Derg Communism phase, and he got mad at me for leaving his refugees in Sudan until 1991. When the Eto-Lives-Matter Protest has been rising in 2019, I made another ban on immigration. I just lifted the ban around mid-September of 2020 because of chaos going with the riots with the OLF protests. I hope we can have better relations and continue with our semitic alliance.
- Swedenball - Recognizes Palestineball. At *least we still can into recognizings each other.
- Russiaball - Stop helping my enemies, you are of terrible friend!. But there is jews on your clay and you have a jewish autonomous oblast, He also lets me attack Iranball when he tries to get into Syriaball so it's important that we stay on good terms , and you recognize a part of Jerusalem as mine.
WHY DONT YOU RECOGNIZE ALL OF JERUSALEM AS MINE.Also can you stop bullying Ukraineball?
- Austriaball - Our relationship is complicated, but we can into peace today. First she persecuted me, then she supported me and now she tries to be neutral peace negotiator. Sigmund Freud helped her to become a doctor! Hopefully we can into peace with Palestineball one day.
There is still too much hate between us, plox help us reconcile... all this war and killings made our hearts hard. Her flag reminds me of treeless Lebanon...
- Ugandaball - WE ARE FINE NOW. But this dick had a physopathic neo-nazi leader once who allowed this terrorist TO HIJACK A PLANE OF MINES!!! FUCKINGS YOU FOR THAT!!! Also, homosex is good!
- Jordanball - Can into recognizings me, but GET OFF THE FENCE.
- Egyptball - Same as Jordanball and GET OFF THE FENCE. Nice pyramids though.
- Chinaball - Again, why Must you support all my enemies!? ALSO CONTROL YUO FREAKING VIRUS YUO DUMB!! But he is one of my largest trading partners.
- Saudi Arabiaball - At least they are not bad as some kebabs i can mention... and they hate Iranball which make them good kebab.
- Armeniaball - We are of similar. But my Holocaust was of worse. I'd love to recognize your holocaust but sadly Turkeyball is always watching. He also doesn't recognize Palestineball, but he hates me because I give weapons to Azerbaijanball haha sorry about that lol.
- Arab Leagueball - Sometimes they are good to me because we hate Iranball but they want me to stop occupying palestine...
- Belarusball - We Had our ups and downs and we are alright now i guess, but one time Lukashenko said jews turned Babruysk into a pigsty and that kinda hurt my feelings :(
- Nazi Germanyball - ממזר חרא מזדיין זונה! נאצי בן זונה! אני אהרוג אותך! בן זונה חרא מטומטם שכמותך! REMOVE FUCKING NAZI, FILTHY DAMN BASTARD!! I'm going to kill all your damn remnants forowers. WHERE IS OF MY APPOLOGY? OR ELSE I MAKE YUO APPOLOGIZE! REMOVE HOLOCAUST!! REMOVE NAZI BASTARRDS!! I WOULD RATHER SMOOCH PALESTINEBALL THAN BE 1 MINUTE IN YOUR PRESENCE! ROT IN YOUR GRAVE YOU FUCKING DEMON, IF YOU EVER COME BACK I'LL BE READY TO KICK YOUR ASS, NO WORDS CAN EXPRESS HOW I HATE YOU SO I WON'T EVEN TRY. FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
- Palestineball - My worst enemy (That is still alive)! YOU FUCKING BITCH I GAVE YOUIR PEOPLE FOOD, WE HAVE PEACE DEALS, AND YOU STILL CRY OUT TO THE REST OF THE MIDDLE EAST WHILE THROWING MISSILES? YOU HYPOCRITE! YOU ANTI-SEMITE BITCH!! I TRIED AGAIN AND AGAIN TO RESOLVE THIS AND EVERY FUCKING TIME IT JUST BACKFIRES, DON'T THINK I'LL FORGET ABOUT THE INTIFADAS YOU TERRORIST! STOP FUCKING SPREADING FAKE NEWS AND CALL ME AN APARTHEID STATE, YOU ARE THE GUY WHO EXECUTES LGBT AND ABDUCTS CHILDREN!!! EVIL I HATE YUO OF GO TO YOUR 22 MUSLIM COUNTRIES AND LEAVE ME ALONE OR YOU CAN SHUT THE FUCK UP AND STOP ATTACKING ME!
- Western Saharaball - FAKE COUNTRY!!! YOU LOOK LIKE PALESTINE (Even the flag, anthem, language, emblem, etc is different from Palestine), BUT IN AFRICA! HE IS ALSO A PUPPET OF ALGERIA!!! GO BACK TO MOROCCO NOW!!!!!
- Iranball - Said he wanna take me out, COME ON! I'm not of afraid! EVEN YOUR FORMER CHILD HATES YOU! 1967 best year of my life!!
- Syriaball - Golan heights are Israeli clay! But on Christmas we both like to make Lebanonball a Christmas tree. i still hate Assad though.
- Cubaball - Of communist anti-semite LAT!!!!!
- Venezuelaball - Another anti-Semite and it is a socialist too! I support Colombiaball against you! He also calls me a burger puppet for being best friends with him.
- Pakistanball - Antisemitic terrorist piece of shit. I will side with Indiaball to remove you!.
We both like Azerbaijanball though.
- George Soros - Disgrace to the Jewish people! You don’t even have Jewish decent!
- Lebanonball - Terrorist! you keep abducting people! REMOVE SHAWARMA!!!! And Hummus is mine! With the help of Syriaball I will turn you into a Christmas tree! But I heard about the explosion that happened in Beirut and Akkar.
- North Koreaball - Stupid Nuclear addict who keeps help fund my enemys.
- San Marinoball and Sentineleseball - I cannot of controllings them help pls!
- Malaysiaball - Remove nasi lemak!! Sabah is part of filipino clay, You boycott all my goods and he is also helper of Palestine! And stop saying to "Israel Koyak" to me and your people!!
- Somaliaball - Anti Semetic Terrorist pirate who does not recognize me, supports Palestineball and protest over the Solominic Family. You deserved to get invaded by NATO!
- Indonesiaball (Except for North Sulawesiball) - Remove Indomie!! You of always respect what the world does to help Palestine and also Recognize Palestine. You also try to kill all Jews and don't recognize them. Why also Sukarno can't into long life so I can into legal religion? Finally, the drunk caliph kid is Indonesian?! Let West Papuaball go!!
Thanks for buying my planes though.
- ISISball - WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID IN TEL AVIV!!! REMOVE TERRORIST!!!!!. אל תעשה!!!!
- Zimbabweball - African Anti Imperialist, stop supporting Palestine and Burger is good!
- Burundiball - Even though it is not anti-imperialist anymore unlike him, but he still supports Palestine!
- Gaddafiball - Am glad you are dead.
- Yugoslaviaball - Helped Egyptball against me! also glad you are dead.
- Soviet Unionball - Never forgive you for what you did with the prisoners of zion! also he funded my enemies and he hated my BFF. Glad you are now the friendlier Russiaball.
- It was under British rule for 28 years.
- Some People hate him because they has many controversial of Palestineball.
- he was only jewish country in the world.
- it has many 137 beaches in his clay.
- It was Semitic but it was not part of Arab Leagueball along with Ethiopiaball, Eritreaball, and Maltaball.
- He hates when someone ask for a cheeseburger at a kosher restaurant.
- Don't make angry when someone is jaywalk.
- Never Touch the Orthodox Person of Opposite Sex.
- He Is The Only Full Democracy in the Middle East
| The |
|Districts||Haifacube • Jerusalemcube • Tel Avivcube • Central Districtcube • Northern Districtcube • Southern Districtcube|
|District capitals||Arielcube • Beershebacube • Haifacube • Jerusalemcube • Nazarethcube • Ramlacube • Tel Avivcube • West Jerusalemcube|
||Ashdodcube • Ashkeloncube • Bat Yamcube • Eilatcube • Givatayimcube • Holoncube • Modiincube • Netanyacube • Ramat Gancube • Tiberiascube|
|Former entities||4ball • Kingdom of Israelcube • Kingdom of Samariacube • Kingdom of Judahcube • Yehudcube • Herodiancube • Iudeaball • Byzantineball • Rashidunball • Umayyadball • Abbasidball • Fatimidball • Kingdom of Jerusalemball • Ayyubidball • Mamlukball • Ottoman Empireball ( Damascus Eyaletball • Mutasarrifate of Jerusalemcube) • British Palestinecube|