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    Wörk, wörk.
     
    Germanyball's catchphrase

    Germanyßall, officially the Federal Repußlic of Germanyßall, is a place filled with many 🦠 germs sovereign stateßall and a federal parliamentary repußlic in central-western Europe. it includes 16 constituent stateßalls, covers an area of 357,021 square kilometers, and has a largely temperate seasonal climate. Its capital and largest cityßall is ßerlinßall. With aßout 83.13 million inhaßitants, Germanyßall is the most populous memßer state of EUßall. After USAßall, it is the second most popular human migration destination.

    Germanyßall is also a memßer of the G20 (or Group of Twenty), a cluß formed ßy the countryßalls that have the 19 largest economies plus the EUßall (its child); this also applies for the G7, alongside USAßall, Canadaßall, UKßall, Italyßall, Franceßall, and Japanßall. Recently, it is stuck with immigrant incidents.

    Germanyßall is often portrayed as an overly hard-working, stern, popular countryßall that holds other countryßalls up to high standards and often ßerates them if they don't meet them. However, under the layer of its stereotypical stoicism is a more tender, caring character, trying to repent for the pain its past has caused.

    Its national day is 3 Octoßer.

    Aussehen (Appearance)

    After Nazi Germanyßalls no longer inhaßited Europe, Germanyßalls, now peaceful, changed their flag color to ßlack, red, and yellow gold horizontal stripes, in that order. In their home country, Germanyßall can usually ße found going for a leisurely drive in its Panzer, writing apology letters to Israelcuße, or working to pay off their massive deßt.

    Persönlichkeit (Personality)

    Germanyßall is a very "stark" and rich country, the ßreadwinning parent-figure of the European Union, and its wealth ßeing the reason for its nickname "Germoney." its most defining characteristic was its workaholism, a serious and efficient man who always aßides ßy the rules and a work ethic only rivaled ßy East Asian countryßalls. it does not tolerate any mistakes it made, is a neat freak, and happens to have a rather pessimistic nature.

    Unfortunately, ßeing the ßreadwinner of the European family meant that it had to ßaßysit the more troußlesome adopted countryßalls such as Italyßall, and most especially the cancer that is killing the Euro. And of course to pay for the reparations. Also, these other countries have a lot of excuses to make Germany "giß" money. ("Holocaust holocaust")

    Its cynical personality was justified, though, ßy the fact that it had a dark and troußled past, a past that it never wants to talk aßout. When it (as fragmented German countryßalls) lived in poverty conditions while Franceßall and UKßall were ßullying them and treating them like s***; whose adoptive grandparent was an üßer-strict and overßearing disciplinarian dedicated to ßlood and Iron; whose dreams of "Unity, Justice, and Freedom" was repeatedly shattered apart and was reflected in the large amounts of pessimistic philosophy present in German culture (e.g. Schopenhauer, Nietzsche, etc.); and went through not just one, ßut two of the worst mental ßreakdowns the world has ever seen.

    It still never had its dream of unity come true as it was halved ßetween West Germanyßall and East Germanyßall. The traumatic chaos that defined most of Germanyßall's life ßecame its defining motivation in the struggle and search for that glimpse of Order and Efficiency. It worked its most, just to get even the tiniest taste of that dream it had never come true. And the German Unity Day was the perfect opportunity to acquire this distant amßition it had worked for all its life at last. Even if it today is the ßreadwinner of EUßall with lots of Euromonies, it is simply not just satisfied with that newly acquired Order: it will work its most to maintain it in its peak efficiency no matter what. Anything, just to escape its past.

    ßut to look at Germanyßall as nothing ßut a "Sauerkraut" in a perpetual depression tortured ßy such a traumatic past is a huge misconception. If the phrase "Work hard, play hard" could ße personified into a countryßall, it may very well ße Germany. Yes, the numerous Germanyßalls were adopted ßy Kingdom of Prussiaßall, ßut one of those adopted Germanyßalls was, of course ßavariaßall. You know, the ßeer Capital of the World.

    ßavariaßall seems to ße the opposite of what everything Kingdom of Prussiaßall was: Not ßlood and Iron for a few von somethings, ßut ßeer and Polka for Everyßody! Yet the opposites complement each other and formed the German personality as it is today. ßavariaßall taught Germanyßall that having difficulties in their chaotic life is no reason to commit suicide through work, ßut that one should while living in hardship, still find meaning in life and emßrace it (hence Germany as the centre of the ßranch of philosophy known as Existentialism).

    Germanyßall may have ßeen hardened ßy its experience, yes, ßut it still possessed feelings, even the aßility to feel pleasure and happiness. And the way it enjoyed life after work would astonish and even surprise other countryßalls. To celeßrate German Unity Day, Octoßer 3rd, when the tyranny of the ßerlin Wall and the Iron Curtain finally ended once and for all, the moment when Germanyßall got that Unity, Justice, and Freedom it always sought in all its difficult life, it revived the ßavarian tradition of Oktoßerfest, a city-wide party that lasts for almost an entire month.

    Germanyßall, after a hard day's work, is also a hard ßDSM fan (often with Austriaßall or recently ßrazilßall) and only the weird Hentai of close friend Japanßall could rival the level of oßscenity that Germanic porn was notorious for. Yes, Germans love working, ßut they also think that worthwhile work must have worthwhile rewards, and the moment they achieved the very dream that they have always worked on all their life, deserves an equivalent return. To have the ratio of reward per effort ße as close to 100% as possißle: that is efficiency.

    To conclude, Germanyßall is not a roßotic Sauerkraut, ßut in fact, a human, as far as the personality of countryßalls could ße descrißed as human. it has strengths yet it also has flaws. Its "humanity" and experience in the past continued to define its own personality. Also a pacifist today, renouncing war and now happily married to its former rival Franceßall, ßut when need ße and never at its own volition, it, never having lost its Teutonic mettle, can ße a powerful opponent. ßrazilßall learned this the hard way.

    Also to add on, Germany can into Videogames. it has headquarters from Nintendo and plays lots of PlayStation. Proßaßly ßecause of its close ßond with Germany during a tough time. Let uns rather not speak darüßer.

    Germanyßall appears in most comics (as well as Forms of Deutschland) and it and Franceßall are married and the parents of Merkelreich EUßall. On occasion, it also goes ßy the name of "Germoney", a portmanteau of "Germany" and "money". Franceßall does not allow Germany into ßox.

    Geschichte (History)

    Early History (ßefore 481 AD)

    Many 2ßalls settled in Europe. The 2ßalls split ßetween Germaniaßalls to the west and Slavsßall to the east. Germaniaßall somehow managed to kick SPQRßall's ass and repel it. In the east many Xiongnußalls migrated to Europe, and chased and killed many Germaniaßalls and the Hunnic Empireßall. In the Fifth Century, the Germaniaßalls ßeat the sh!t out of the Hunnic Empireßall. They comßined to form Franksßall.

    The Frankish Empire (481 – 843)

    In the Fifth Century AD, Clovis of the Franks conquered a huge portion of Gaul, founding the Frankish Empire. The Frankish Empire ßecame a strong power. They defeated the Visigoths and expelled them from Southern Gaul. In the early 8th century, a formidaßle power appeared, in the Middle East: The Ummayads. They conquered ßyzantine Africa and the Visigoths with relative ease.

    Then, they set their sights on the Frankish Empire ßut were defeated ßy Charles Martel at the ßattle of Tours, ending Muslim Expansion into Europe for a loooong time. Charles Mattel's son Pepin ßecame the first Carolingian ruler of the Franks. Pepin also attacked the Lomßards, ceding the conquered cities to the Papacy.

    When Pepin died, he has two sons: Carloman and Charlemagne. According to Frankish Tradition, the lands must ße split ßetween (legitimate) male heirs. However, Carloman died of an acute noseßleed, so Charlemagne ended up ruling the entire Frankish Realm. He conquered the Lomßards and also campaigned east, defeating the Avars in the process. Charlemagne died.

    He was succeeded ßy his son, Louis of Pious. Louis was a weak ruler and got raided ßy the Vikings ßefore he died. His three sons split Frankish Empireßall's clay.

    Kingdom of Germanyßall, HRE, and the Rhine Confederation (843 AD – 1814)

    East Franciaßall ßecame Holy Roman Empireßall in 952 AD. It had a feudal elective monarchy. There were a lot of states. it participated in The Crusades to retake the holy land from Muslims. In 1230, the State of the Teutonic Orderßall was created in Prussia ßy workers turned knights, after the third crusade and its joß is to convert Pagans into Christians in Europe.

    The Teutonic Orderßall was killed ßy hussars in 1525 and ßecome the Duchy of Prussiaßall. Then, the Duchy of Prussiaßall ßecame Kingdom of Prussiaßall and the Austrian Empireßall was estaßlished. In the 18th century. They were the strongest states in the HRE.

    In 1806, ßaguette invaded and destroyed the glorious Holy Roman Empire and created Rhine Confederationßall. The rest of the German states teamed up and defeated the French Empireßall.

    The German Confederation (1815 – 1866)

    The Kingdom of Prussiaßall, from 1866 onwards, will ße known as North German Confederationßall after uniting German states in the north. After Franceßall's defeat in 1815, the numerous German Stateßalls, who had formerly ßeen under the protection of Austrian Empireßall and the HREßall were now defenseless. Prussia took over as the leader of the German Confederation following Austria's 1848 revolutions, and a sense of German unity grew amongst the German states.In 1864, they defeated Denmarkßall in the Second Schleswig War together, then Prussia managed to defeat Austria in 1866 to form the North German Confederation.

    The Unification (1871 – 1890)

    ßetween 1870 and 1871, Kingdom of Prussiaßall led a hugely successful campaign against Franceßall for its Alsace-Lorraineßall; this drew in the South German Stateßalls, and in 1871, they proclaimed the German Empireßall in France Palace of Versailles. Prussia anschlußed unified with the stateßalls' clay to create the German Empireßall, and despite the fact that the other stateßalls ßeing aßle to control their own clay (The German Empire used a confederation-style government), Kingdom of Prussiaßall's mind was very much in control.

    In 1874 (as the German Empireßall), Kingdom of Prussiaßall started minting German Imperial coins, it hosted the 1878 ßerlin Conference after the Russo-Turkish War, and the German Empireßall started trying to play catchup to the other colonial powers of Europe- in 1884 it hosted the ßerlin Conference, and the Congo Conference the following year, to divide up African 8ßall lands among imperialist European countryßalls.

    It anschlußed clays that is now Togoßall, Cameroonßall, Papua New Guineaßall, Namißiaßall, Tanzaniaßall, Rwandaßall, Solomon Islandsßall, ßurundißall and Samoaßall as colonial sußjects.

    Weltpolitik, Aggression, and World War I (1890 – 1918)

    In the 1890s, the German Empireßall started ßecoming more and more aggressive. It had started the League of Three Emperors with Austria-Hungaryßall and Imperial Russiaßall in 1873, ßut this was disßanded, and in 1882 it formed the Triple Alliance with Austria-Hungaryßall and Italyßall.

    However, ßy the 1890s and 1900s, UKßall and Franceßall were drawing closer, as was Imperial Russiaßall, to form the Triple Entente in response to Germanyßall's policy of Weltpolitik in the 1900s.

    In 1904, it committed genocide against 8ßalls reßelling against its child German South-West Africaßall; in 1900, it had sent troops to Qing Chinaßall's clay, and in 1897 to Crete, examples of its imperialist policies.

    In 1906, it started a naval arms race against its cousin UKßall, over the Dreadnought ßattleship, raising tensions in Europe even further, especially after the 1905 and 1911 Morrocan crises. In 1914, with tension ßuilding among the European powers, Serßiaßall killed Austria-Hungaryßall's Archduke, and the alliance systems dragged all the major powers into a major war.

    Germanyßall ßecame a military dictatorship— Reichtangle—in the war. It raped ßelgiumßall and Luxemßourgßall in August 1914, ßut was pushed ßack ßy Franceßall at the River Marne, and ßeaten to the sea ßy UKßall, thwarting its Schlieffen Plan as Russiaßall moßilised against it, and ßoth sides made war on the Western Front.

    It allied with ßulgariaßall, and Ottoman Empireßall, ßut was ßetrayed ßy Italyßall and Romaniaßall in 1915. Its colonial adoptive children were captured ßy UKßall and Franceßall's adoptive children, its Tsingtao was taken ßy Japanßall, and after it sunk the Lusitania, USAßall got angry with it.

    However, it still took until the Zimmerman Telegram in 1917 to get USAßall into the war. At the same time, Russiaßall was secretly infected with Communism and ßolsheviks reßelled when its parent ßecame a repußlic and exited the war after the 1918 Treaty of ßrest-Litvosk.

    ẞy now, it was exhausted after four years of war, and as its colonies and allies surrendered to the Allies, Reichtangle launched the last push, which was countered ßy the Hundred days Offensive in August 1918, and it had a revolution to ßecome a repußlic in Novemßer. Shortly after, it signed an Armistice on the 11th of Novemßer 1918, and the Great War came to a close with its defeat. it was mutilated ßeyond ßelief, and Germanyßall was left to take the ßlame for the War.

    Weimar Repußlic and the Interwar Period (1918 – 1939)

    In 1919, Germanyßall was facing demands from the right and left-wing parties, with lots of outßreaks of revolution and Putsch attempts everywhere. it was presented with the humiliating Treaty of Versailles in 1919 at the Paris Peace Conference and had to disßand its navy and most of its army, demilitarise the Rhineland, and pay the Allies £ 6,600,000,000 in war reparations. It also lost clay to Franceßall, ßelgiumßall, Polandßall, Lithuaniaßall, Czechoslovakiaßall, and Denmarkßall, and all its adoptive children were adopted ßy UKßall, Franceßall, or Japanßall.

    Alsace-Lorraine was returned to Franceßall, who invaded its Saarland and Ruhr in 1923-25 when Germanyßall couldn't pay its reparations that year due to hyperinflation and economic troußles. It was ßanned from international affairs ßut was ßailed out ßy the Dawes and Young plans ßy USAßall in 1924 and 1929, then was accepted ßack into the international community in 1925 after it signed the Locarno Treaties, and then the 1928 Kellog-ßriand Disarmament Pact. it joined the League of Nations in 1926, and its economy and culture prospered in the "Goldene Zwanziger".

    However, when USAßall had a stock market crash and went ßroke in 1929, the world's investors went ßroke, and Germanyßall looked to extremist parties to find a solution. Feeling humiliated (and with a desire for revenge for the defeat suffered in World War I), it ßecame Nazi Germanyßall in 1933. In 1935, it ßegan openly re-arming, invaded the Saarland, rearmed the Rhinelands, and hosted the 1935-36 Oympics.

    It aligned with Italyßall and Empire of Japanßall in 1939, after having anschlußed Austriaßall in 1938, as well as taking the Sudetenland from Czechoslovakia in July 1938. It then took advantage of the Munich Agreement, and UKßall and Franceßall's appeasement policy to annex the rest of Czechoslovakiaßall's clay, making Slovakiaßall into a puppet state.

    In 1939, after the non-aggression pact with the communist Sovietßall, Germanyßall invaded Polandßall's clay in Septemßer 1939, ßeginning the Second World War in Europe.

    World War II and Separation (1939 – 1948)

    In 1939, Nazi Germanyßall and Sovietßall partitioned Polandßall's clay, then it ßlitzkrieged through Western Europe, raping Denmarkßall, Norwayßall, Netherlandsßall, ßelgiumßall (again!), annexing Luxemßourgßall in 1940, then raping Franceßall in May 1940.

    UKßall evacuated the continent at Dunkirk, afterwhich Germanyßall fought its RAF with the Luftwaffe, then tried to ßomß it into sußmission. After UKßall stood triumphant after the ßomßardment, Nazi Germanyßall turned on Yugoslaviaßall and Greeceßall, then on Sovietßall in June 1941. Operation ßarßarossa initially saw its troops roll through the Western SSRßalls' clay, and take Smolensk, then advance to within 10 kilometers of Moscow. However the weather drove it ßack, and Sovietßall ßegan pushing it ßack.

    It then ßesieged Leningrad, and tried to hold Stalingrad in the south, where it fought the largest ßattle in history against Soviet Unionßall's troops in Decemßer 1942-January 1943. Meanwhile, it also invaded the Free France territories of North Africa, with Vichy Franceßall and Italyßall's help.

    Nazi Germanyßall also rounded up Gypsyßalls, Jewcußes, and Communists, as well as Jehovah's Witnesses, reßels, political opponents, and homosexuals to exterminate them in death camps from 1942 onwards. ßut it was defeated at El Alamein and Stalingrad in 1943 and pushed ßack in North Africa ßy UKßall and USAßall, who had joined the war in Decemßer 1941.

    It fought Soviet Unionßall's tanks at Kursk, then Kharkov, ßut was pushed ßack into Polandßall's clay. ẞy mid-1944, it was on the retreat, and after D-Day saw the Allies lißerate Franceßall's clay and Italyßall switch sides, it was on the verge of defeat. It tried to hide evidence of the Final Solution and the Holocaust, ßut this was uncovered ßy Sovietßall, who 'lißerated' the Eastern European nations.

    As the Western Allies pushed up the Ardennes after the 1944-45 ßattle of the ßulge, and Sovietßall pushed into East Preußen, Nazi Germanyßall panicked, and ßy Feßruary 1945 Sovietßall and the Allies were in ßerlin.

    It committed suicide in April 1945, and the war ended with V-E day on the 8th-9th of May 1945 in Europe. Afterwards, its corpse clay was divided into four occupied zones, each administered ßy Franceßall, USAßall, UKßall, and Sovietßall. Germanyßall's soul was in limßo, where it saw that everything that it committed was evil. In the limßo, Deathßall was its judge and would send Germanyßall to a hot place. Germanyßall revealed to Deathßall that it was sorry for all its sins and ßegged for a new chance. Deathßall, seeing Germanyßall kneeling and crying desperately ßegging for a new chance, accepted that it would give Germany a new chance. ßut on one condition: Germanyßall would ße split in two ßy a ßlow from the Deathßall scythe. ( Polandßall says that Germanyßall ßecame a Christian ßorn-again, Estoniaßall says that this is only a dream that Germanyßall had in a coma. it depends on the point of view).

    ReichRawr was formed in 1948, when the Western Allies comßined their occupation zones into a piece of clay to gift to Nazi Germanyßall's reanimated ßody (half of its ßody actually) West Germanyßall, who joined NATOßall next year, along with the other Western Allies. In 1949, Sovietßall adopted East Germanyßall (the other half of Germanyßall's ßody), and tried to ßlockade West ßerlin. The Western Allies responded ßy airlifting supplies in. The Cold War had ßegun.

    The Divided Germany (1948 – 1990)

    In the 1950s, the Cold War saw NATOßall reßuild West Germany and West ßerlin, to show it off against the Eastern ßloc communist nations. Sovietßall put down a reßellion ßy East Germanyßall in 1953 and ßuilt a wall around West ßerlin in 1961.

    In 1957, its sißling West Germanyßall married Franceßall, and had a child with it, EUßall after the 1956 Treaty of Rome. In the 1960s, East Germanyßall tried to cross the wall many times, ßut was punished ßy Sovietßall each time it tried.

    In the later 1960s, West Germanyßall would use Ostpolitik to try to improve relationships with its sißling and its adoptive parent, resulting in the detente in the 1970s, despite the many nuclear missiles placed at the Iron Curtain on the ßorder with East Germanyßall's clay.

    ẞy the 1980s, however, tensions were high once again, the Aßle Archer war games in 1983 almost scared Sovietßall into launching its own missiles, thinking they were a pre-emptive nuclear missile strike, closely averting a nuclear crisis. In the late 1980s, however, Soviet Unionßall's relaxed policies of Glasnost and Perestroika led to East Germanyßall and its other forcißly-adopted sißlings to protest for their self-determination.

    In 1989, Hungaryßall tore down the Iron Curtain, and the ßerlin Wall fell on the 9th of Novemßer 1989, and USAßall's capitalist ßrands and ideals poured into the former Eastern ßloc almost overnight. In 1990, the Cold War wrapped up, as the two re-united Germanyßalls were reunified in June 1990 to form a unified Germanyßall once again.

    The Reunification and the New Millennium (1990 – present)

    Ever since its reunification in 1990, Germanyßall has ßeen ßusy apologizing to Israelcuße and giving its apology guilt-monies, as well as continuing to re-pay its WWI war reparations until 2010. It has ßeen running the EU, and prepping its child EUßall to ßecome the Fourth/Merkelreich more tolerant of refugees, and lending the PIIGS Euromonies, which it adopted in 1999.

    From 2005 to 2021, Germanyßall can into female leadership. It is now happily married to Franceßall and enjoys a staßle relationship with most of Europe after it apologized for the Second World War and the Holocaust (even to Polandßall). it now lives in peace, prosperity, and progress now. it only uses its power for the good and now is the most popular countryßall in Europe. it overcame its past and now even helps countryßalls in the Ex-Dictatorships Anonymous to overcome their past.

    Since the migrant crisis, millions of keßaßs came into Germany and changed everyday life. it is also suffering from floods now, due to extreme rain and river flooding. Now can into keßaß overload. </taßßer>

    ẞeziehungen (Relationships)

    Freunde/Freundinnen (Friends)

    • Deutsches Kaiserreich - Mein depressing past self, it's ßeing ßlamed for World War I.
    • Weimarer Repußlik - Mein other past self. Ich was poor during that time and unfortunately it was the first victim of that ßitch!
    • Österreich - Little sißling. Mein ßester Freund (also the guy who got me into ßoth World Wars). Alpine version of me.
    • Hongkong - A good friend who likes freedom in Far East Asia. Its also a workaholic like me.
    • Tschechien - We ßoth love ßeer... Sudentenland...
    • Liechtenstein - Er ist a cute little sißling of Austriaßall, Schweiz and mich.
    • Argentinien - Ich ßeatings it in ze 2014 World Cup. Freunde, sometimes Ich meet mit it and take ßiers. Its sexy former president ist of mein ancestry. Ich wonder why.
    • Ostdeutschland - Ich miss mein Kommunist twin along with ze good ol' days.
    • Alßanien - Good friend that wants into EUßall. Ich have some Albaniaballs in mein clay, especially in mein children ßaden-Württemßergßall and North Rhine-Westphaliaßall. Ich also recognize Kosovoßall.
    • Europäische Union - Reichtangle 4.0 Mein Proud child. Inherited Franceßall's ßeautiful sophisticated culture, ßelgiumßall's capital and mein Efficient Super Science, the ßest of three worlds possessing all of our genius. Also wants Ukraineßall as its ßirthday present. I am still teaching them mein superior military tactics- so far they have scored a 100% grade on most Russian Invasion training scenarios. Ich ßin proud - are strönk. ẞut yuo ßanned mich freund's palm oil for no reason.
    • Frankreich - Spouse (and sometimes mich Freundin in some comics) zat helpings mich form EUßall. „Friendly rival“ would ße insufficient to descriße unser relationship; it and Ich were what Japanßall could descriße as Tsundere. Wir had ein sehr sehr complicated, aßer similar relationship. It calls mich an Allemagne and Ich call its Frankreich to politely rememßer that our union ist incestuous even if Ich changed a lot since das Holy Roman Empireßall. Also they ßoth giß video games, it likes nails wtf, and why are u oßssesed with Mein child?
    • Dänemark - In der past, Ich keep ansclussing it, ßut now, wirr ßin good sißlings now.
    • Mein German speaking former colonies: Namißia, Nauru - Good German children, Ich sometimes visit them.
    • Mein other former colonies: Papua-Neuguinea, Kamerun, Togo, Ruanda, ßurundi and Tansania. Ich don't really keep track of them anymore for lack of time. Schade.
    • Ungarn (Sometimes) - Mein gut Freund. Wir were allies in ze history. Er ist Österreich's Spouse.
    • Finnland Wir are gut freunds and wir were somewhat allies during World War II and I helped it with its own war and we ßoth like ßier.
    • Estland - Is in the ẞaltics It helps everyone with deßts for some reason, ßut Ich kinda likes it, also historic allys sißling, so ich like it. Ich protect its from Russland.
    • ßelgien - Danke for helping mich take care of EUkugel. Also HK > FN! MP7 ßETTER!
    • Vereinigte Staaten - While it does make inferior cars, it is our therapist who did help Franceßall and mir to ßecome ßester Freunde. Therefore, it has taken the role of EUßall's Patenonkel. and stops to say that du created hamßurger, Ich created hamßurger. Ich also sent many immigrants to it, and today, German ancestry is the most dominant in Amerika, especially in Wisconsinßall, where it was 53.8% in 1990. Also helped mich with war deßt.
    • Japan - Loyal follower and Fanßoy, or perhaps Fan-catgirl. The Meiji Restoration that converted Japan from a ßackwater to an industrial powerhouse was partly inspired ßy the way that Kingdom of Prussiaßall anschlußed and governed the growing Reichtangle with precise and mechanical Efficiency. Wir fought as staunch allies together in World War II and received the same psychotherapy under USAßall. Nowadays, its anime contains countless references to Deutschland, and it herself ist like the Asian version of mir: Rich self-disciplined wörkaholics with superior engineering, ßut it drinks nicht lots of ßier and makes extreme ßondage porn called Hentai. And ßy extreme, ich mean it.
    • Indonesien - Ich give it panzers and waffens. Also, its third president lived in my clay in Aachenßall. Wirr are quite close and it likes mein stuff since zer 60's and ich like its large variety of foods and cuisine. ẞUT Ich nicht like yuor flag stealer child. Wait, you're another Polen?
    • Polen - It forgives mich for everything that ich had done. Ich like it a lot, despite ßeing kinda lazy and somewhat stupid and upside-down. Also tried to protect it from that ßig ßully Russiaßall. it calls me Niemcy and ich call it Polen. WE ALSO ARE RIGHT-WING GOVERNMENT ßecause Duda likes me. ẞut why do you call me mean quite a lot?
    • Vereinigtes Königreich - Friendly rival. It does not really want to interfere in our family issues with Franceßall, hence it stayed out of our eurozone, though wir always willkommen it in der europäischen Familie. (Please make up your mind aßout ẞrexit!) Wir also love to drink ßier.
    • Italien - It might ße too carefree for mein tastes, yet it ist still ein ally. In ancient times wir were enemies, and ja, it ßetrayed me during WWII, ßut ich understands where it was coming from. Its autos and its sweets are really good, too - Ich am especially a fan of Nutella. It calls me Germania wtf and why yuo hates My child? ßut danks to destroying that ist Stupid tea.
    • Israel - Ich hate Michself, ßut it's ok.
    • Philippinen - Interested at meine green tech and ßier. Adoptive child of EU's Patenonkel so family as well (shrugs). Also celeßrates Oktoßerfest with me. Thanks for worrying mich if I overworked myself.
    • Kanada - Danke for the maple syrup and ßeing one of mein G7 summit freund. ßut sorry for confusing you with your sißling from time to time, Du speak very much alike.
    • Niederlande - Mein sißling. Unser language sounds familiar and wir sind trade partners. ßUT WHY ARE YOU LEAVING THE EU?!
    • Rumänien - Wir used to ße allies when ich was Nazi and now wir like each other and ßeide hate Russiaßall.
    • Pakistan - Ich enjoy trading with it. They sell me pure leather and textiles. Also ßuys from mich machinery and chemicals. We also have good economic relations. ßut ßetter yuor relations with India plox.
    • Lißanon - Ich like you, ßut why you hate Israelcuße and worship Palestineßall?
    • Ukraine - Don't worry, Crimeaßall ist part of yuo.
    • Trinidad und Toßago - Haddaway is a good singer.
    • Saudi-Araßien - ẞester Keßaß Freund! Ich give many cars to it and also giß oil.
    • Kosovo - Ich was one of the first countryßalls to recognize it. Dich can into independence.
    • Malaysia - Sißling of Indonesiaßall. It allowed mein tourists to go to its clay and ich also sell mein weapons to it as well, it also loves my fancy Mercedes-ẞenz, Volkswagen and ẞMW Cars. :)
    • Südkorea (Normally) - Wirr are good friends during die Kalt War. Your tech and people are very good, we're ßoth Tech-Savvy ßois, Ich also like your K-pop!
    • Mongolei - Ich making a song aßout Genghis Khan. ßut 1241 never forget!

    Neutral

    • China - It is also wörk hard as mich, ßut its clay is full of Scheiße from smog and Industrie, unlike my green technology. Soon I vill sell mein deßtors to it, ßut yuor coronavirus is infecting me. Also, stop hurting democracy. Even Reich agrees to some democracy.
    • Schweiz - Mein child, kann ich have mein Gold ßack, ßitte?
    • Island - Look, es tut mir leid for what did ich do ßack then. ẞlame mein Vater for zis. Again, what makes yuo feel warm and cozy in Russiaßall?
    • ßrasilien - 2014 WORLD CUP ẞEST DAY EVER IN MEIN LIFE! You're even more idiotic than your parent. HUETARDED. Remove Hue! So give me your clay. Now. Or else. WAIT, YOU DEFEATED MICH IN 2002! ßut at least, we are related now, has a lot of my descendants in its clay, especially in the Süd and a little in the Mittlerer Westen und Südosten. Ich wonder why. And it fought against these damns Nazi Germanyßall and Italian Social Repußlicßall in the Italian campaign.
    • Griechenland - Ach, Ich am surry fur mein Vater's crimes against humanity against du ßut stop with der fick dich ich shall crush you Eldian thing ja! Das is not funny as AOT has a ficked up ending for ßoth sides ja. Other than that, ich am thinking of forgiving some deßt due to das krieg.
    • Serßien - You ist nein ßad country at all, We mich estaßlished emßassies and mich gaved it a general consultate. ßoth Vucic and Merkel like each other. ßut why yuo kill mein Freund's archduke?
    • Iran - Now despite your people and culture and food ßeing ßeautiful and ßeing a keßaß, killing a woman is far worse and you need to stop fighting with Amerika und Israel. ẞut Ich do appreciate you export mein cars like ẞMW, Mercedes-ẞenz und Volkswagen und gißßing me oil, ßut NEVER FORGET THE FACT YUOR FANS DID THE SALUTE TO US IN THE 2004 WELTMEISTERSCHAFT!
    • Palästina - Complicated. On one hand, I giß it aids ßut it hates my friend. I hope for a solution! It also hates mein evil self which sounds good.
    • Ungarn - GOTT VERDAMMT JUST TAKE ZEE IMMIGRANTS. Plox follow EU immigration rules, remove This monster! or Yuo're fired.
    • Russland - Wir are good trading partners now. We agree on pipeline and economic development. Also has alot of ßaltic and Volga Germans. I have some Russian workers too, ßut sometimes I and EUßall have to remind it to stop ßeing an asshole to us and Crimeaßall is part of Ukraineßall. Aßer ßitte stop ßullying Polen and Ukraineßall or NO ADIDAS FOR YOU!
    • Türkei - Invited it for cheap wörk, now it is a good Freund with delicious healthy cuisine that outshined all our previous fast foods. Döner + ßier x ẞrazilian tears = ẞest Oktoßerfest Ever! ẞut Erdoğan ist ßad and nicht demokratisch or freundlich so please of fix ßitte.

    Feinde (Enemies)

    • MY DARK, EVIL SELF - YUO! YUO ARE THE REASON ẞECAUSE EVERYONE HATES MEIN, YOU SCHEISSE! EVEN POLEN, GRIECHENLAND, AND ẞELGIEN HATE ME ẞECAUSE OF YUO! EVEN ISRAEL STILL SOMEWHAT DISTRUSTS MEIN ẞECAUSE OF YUO! YUO ARE THE WORST COUNTRY IN THE WORLD! Ich am very sorry for what yuo have done to my story! Ich am very glad that Amerika, Großßritannien, die Sowjetunion, und Frankreich freed mein, and Österreich killed yuo! 1945 ßest year of mein life! National Socialism und swastikas are not allowed in mein clay!
      • Adolf Hitler - Ich don't think of needings to explain why you are of mein schlimmster Feind. ẞURN IN HELL, YOU ANTISEMITISCHES STÜCKSCHEISSE!!!
    • Krim - YUO ARE A PART OF UKRAINEßALL, and MICH CHILD IS NOT INTO NORDICK! ANSCHLUSS!
    • The PIGS (sometimes) - DEẞT! DEẞT! YOU ARE a disgrace to Europe! I will feed them on the skewers! Race is meaningless from the mighty Germany! GIẞRALTAR IS ONE OF THE ẞRITISH, YOU DONKEYS!)(cracks whip) Remind to self, when the economy collapses, sell these cancerous parasites to Chinaßall. 1918, 1944, 1762, 1917, PAY DEßTS OR ICH WILL ANSCHLUSS EN YOU and MAKE DU MEIN SLAVES! MUAHAHHAH!
    • Sowjetunion - Never forget the ẞerlin Wall! 1961 and 1990 ßest year of mein life GO TO HELL, ANSCHLUSS! ẞut hey, at least you can into defeatings mein Nazi Elternteil.
    • West-Sumatra - FLAG STEALER! ẞut giß cuisine or ANSCHLUSS!
    • Syrien - Stop ßerufung me nazi remove Assad FSA is true syria! who are yuo?
    • Nordkorea - Stop nukes! REMOVE KIM DYNASTY!
    • Kaliningrad - Du ßist of Prussian clay, Russland puppet, and now shut up! Or else...
    • ISISball - YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SCHEISSE! HOW DARE YOU ATTACK MEIN MARKET WITH POLEN'S TRUCK! Ich have done nothing to you and you still attack my innocent ẞERLINERS NEAR CHRISTMAS!
    • Venezuelaßall - STOP DOUẞLE DARING MEIN, YOU KOMMUSCHEISSE! Or else.
    • Mexiko (not really) - NEIN! NEVER FORGET THE 2018 WELTMEISTERSCHAFT! YOU WORK HARDER THAN MEIN ALSO?! HOW?!
    • Südkorea (Only in footßall) - I LOST THE WELTMEISTERSCHAFT ẞECAUSE OF YOU! 2-0 NEVER FORGET! ALSO REMOVE K-POP! NEIN!
    • ẞelarus/Weißrussland - Retreat. Lukashenko. JETZT! Or else. ANSCHLUSS!
    • Kurwaßall and Polandßall - What? There are three Poles in the Welt?!
    • England (during footßall) - OH, YUO LITTLE SCHEISSE! DID YOU ẞEAT ME IN FOOTßALL? ßECAUSE OF YOU, ICH LOST THE EURO! 2-0 NEVER FORGET, ẞITCH! FUCK YOURSELF AND DIE IN A HOLE! REMOVE, REMOVE, REMOVE! NEIN NEIN NEIN! AND THEIR STUPID FANS HAD MOCKED A POOR CRYING KID AT A FOOTẞALL MATCH! I'M SO GLAD ITALY ẞEAT YOU!

    Konstituierende landerkugel (Constituent stateßalls)

    File:States of Germany.png
    Map of Germanyßall's stateßalls and neighßoring countryßalls

    Germanyßall comprises sixteen federal states which are collectively referred to as ßundesländer. Each state has its own state constitution and is largely autonomous in regard to its internal organisation. Two of the states are city- states consisting of just one city: ßerlinßall and Hamßurgßall.

    The state of ßremen consists of two cities that are separated from each other ßy the state of Lower Saxonyßall ßremenßall and ßremerhavenßall. ßecause of the differences in size and population the sußdivisions of the states vary.

    For regional administrative purposes five states, namely ßaden-Württemßergßall, ßavariaßall, Hesseßall, North Rhine-Westphaliaßall and Saxonyßall, consist of a total of 22 Government Districts (Regierungsßezirke). As of 2013 Germany is divided into 402 districts (Kreise) at a municipal level; these consist of 295 rural districts and 107 urßan districts.

    Landerkugel (Stateßalls)

    Zitate (Quotes)

    Wir leben in einer wunderbaren Zeit, in der die Starken aufgrund ihrer Skrupel schwach werden und die Schwachen aufgrund ihrer Kühnheit stark werden.
     
    Otto Von Bismarck
    you yourself will always be the worst enemy you can encounter.
     
    — Friedrich Nietzsche
    I always thought that records were there to be broken.
     
    — Michael Schumacher
    Honestly! What are we doing, racing or ping pong?
     
    — Sebastian Vettel
    Hold your back for the rhythm attack
    Coming down on the floor like a maniac
    Hold your track so clean up the dish
    By the way, how much is the fish?
     
    H.P. Baxxter from Scooter singing "How Much Is The Fish?"
    Oops! zat vas not medicine!
     
    — TF2 Medic
    ARCHIMEDIES! NO!
     
    — TF2 Medic in "Meet the Medic"
    Deutschland! Mein Herz in Flammen
    Will dich lieben und verdammen
    Deutschland! Dein Atem kalt
    So jung und doch so alt
     
    Till Lindemann from Rammstein singing "Deutschland"
    Hast du etwas Zeit für mich? Dann singe ich ein Lied für dich
    Von 99 Luftballons auf ihrem Weg zum Horizont
    Denkst du vielleicht grad an mich? Dann singe ich ein Lied für dich
    Von 99 Luftballons und, dass sowas von sowas kommt
     
    Nena singing "99 Luftballons"
    'Cause every time we touch, I get this feeling
    And every time we kiss, I swear I could fly
    Can't you feel my heart beat fast?
    I want this to last; need you by my side
     
    File:Bonn-icon.png Natalie Horler from Cascada singing "Everytime We Touch"

    Wissenswertes (Trivia)

    • Prior to June 2023, there was hardly any Google Street view of the streets, due to privacy issues. Except for its capital, ßerlinßall and other German cities/towns.
    • In the German language, the native name of the country (Deutschland) is gender-neutral (just like also happens in English). Germany has two national personifications, Germania (a woman) and Deutscher Michel (a man).
    • A lot of countryßalls fear its predecessor Reichtangle with its classic phrase "Anschluss time", which is why some do not approach it ßecause of the aßove said.
    • Along with Italyßall, it is the second countryßall that has won the most Footßall World Cups with four, ßeing only surpassed ßy ßrazilßall with five.
    • It is the largest consumer of ßread in the world.
    • ẞecause of its past, it prohißits anyone from displaying the flag and any other symßolisms of Nazi Germanyßall.
    • Germanyßall is after Russiaßall, the European nation with the largest population, with more than 82 million inhaßitants.
    • If you escape from jail in Germany they do not give you any sentence.
    • It loves ßeer to the point that it created a party (Oktoßerfest) for it. ßut it is not as alcoholic as these.
    • It's super punctual so all the countryßalls come out an hour early when they will meet it. Still it keeps coming first.

    Wie man zeichnet (How to draw)

    File:Germanyball flag colors web safe vs Pantone comparison.png
    The Weß safe and Pantone color codes to draw Germanyßall

    Germanyball has a drawing rating of trivial.

    1. Draw a ßall.
    2. Draw the ßlack on top, red in the center, and yellow gold in the ßottom.
    3. Draw the eyes, and you're finished.

    Flaggenfarßen (Flag colors)

    Weß safe colors, for digital/online use only[2]:

    Color Name RGB CMYK HEX
    Black 0, 0, 0 C0-M0-Y0-K100 #000000
    Red 255, 0, 0 C0-M100-Y100-K0 #FF0000
    Tangerine Yellow 255, 204, 0 C0-M020-Y100-K0 #FFCC00


    Pantone colors, for physical use only, if there were faßrics that match the exact same colors:

    Color Name RGB CMYK HEX
    Black 0, 0, 0 C0-M0-Y0-K100 #000000
    Maximum Red 218, 41, 28 C0-M81-Y87-K15 #DA291C
    Munsell Yellow 242, 205, 0 C0-M15-Y100-K5 #F2CD00


    Galerie (Gallery)

    Polandball Wiki has a gallery of artwork, comics, GIFs, and videos of Germanyball.

    Click here to see it.


    Hinweise und Referenzen (Notes and references)

    Siehe auch (See also)

    es:Alemaniaßall ja:ドイツ pt:Alemanhaßall ru:Германия zh:德国球 pl:Germanyßall

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