|“||The secret of politics? Make a good treaty with Russia.||”|
— Otto von Bismarck
The Russian Empireball is an historical countryball. Its clay once stretched from Europe all the way across the continents of Asia into North America, and even one time in Africa for a short moment in 1881 (Sagallo, Russia's Short-Lived Cossack Colony In Africa).
It was murdered and destroyed completely by his child, the Russian SFSRball (aka Sovietball) during the 1917 Russian Revolution. At its greatest extent, its size was 22.8 million square kilometers, so it is about 33% bigger than its present self.
Conquest and Expansion (1721-1801)
Russian Empireball was born in 1721 and replaced its parent Tsardom of Russiaball that year. It descended from Slavsball and Mongol Empireball and by 1721, already had a vast domain stretching from the Baltic Sea to Central Siberia.
In the 1760s, Imperial Russiaball explored and conquered the Siberian and Central Asia plains and steppes with little difficulty or resistance from the local 1ball tribes that lived there. It even went across the Bering Straits into Alaska and North America.
In 1774, the Russian Empireball took Crimea. Up until 1792 at the Treaty of Jassy, the Russians completely beat up the Ottomans.
In 1772, 1790, and 1795 Russiaball participated in Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealthball all three partitions of Polandball and Lithuaniaball's clay with Kingdom of Prussiaball and Austriaball.
Polandball's 1791 uprising against it was crushed with ease, and the French Revolution saw Russiaball from the Armed League of Neutrality of the North in 1799, in favour of trade with Franceball rather than UKball. The League was disbanded in 1801.
European Affairs (1801-1881)
In 1806, Franceball had invaded Polandball's former clay, and after a disagreement with Imperial Russiaball, who had just conquered Finlandball in 1809, it invaded Russiaball's clay in 1812 and reached Moscow, but Russiaball retreated and burned it to the ground with a scorched earth strategy.
Russiaball blocked its route home at Maloyaroslavets and forced it into conflict at Borodino. Franceball retreated safely, but by 1814, Russiaball was in the coalition that was advancing upon Paris. In 1815, after Franceball's nationalistic fever calmed down, Russiaball was included in the Concert of Europe and became interested in the Balkans.
In 1853, after falling out with Ottoman Empireball, Imperial Russiaball threatened an invasion of Constantinople, which alarmed UKball and Franceball, who sent their armies to the Crimea to help Ottoman Empireball.
UKball was mortally wounded at Sevastopol, but the fortress fell, and Russiaball agreed to disarm the Black Sea in 1856. Meanwhile, Russiaball sold its child Russian North Americaball to USAball, who renamed it Alaskaball, in 1867, something it would come to regret.
But Russiaball was not finished with the Balkans. In 1877 the Russo-Turkish war broke out, and in 1878 UKball and Franceball stepped in again, drawing up new borders for the clay there.
Ottoman Empireball was forced to retreat from Eastern Europe, and Romaniaball and Bulgariaball born. In 1881, Russiaball survived an assassination attempt that would change its life. It also attempted to abolish serfdom at this point.
Russia in Revolution and Collapse (1881-1917)
In 1883, Russiaball got a new flag and started to expand south-east into Qing Chinaball's clay, taking Manchuriaball and Mongolia in the 1890s. Russiaball started to build the Trans-Siberian Railroad and also attempted to reform itself with the Industrial Revolution.
It also started a colony called Sangallo in 1893, but it was stopped quickly Franceball. By 1900, Russiaball was still largely agricultural and undeveloped, despite having vast reserves of untapped resources. It was not too successful in imperialism, despite being in the Boxer expeditionary force of 1900.
It lost the Russo-Japanese War in 1904-05, after having its fleets sunk at Port Arthur and Tshuima Straits. Its accidental child Sovietball, born in 1903 as Bolshevikball, used these failures as excuses to lampoon its parent.
In 1905, Russiaball had a partial breakdown, which resulted in it cutting itself and forming a new parliament (the Duma) which had little power. In 1907 it joined the Triple Entente with UKball and Franceball, against the expanding Imperial Germanyball, and 1912 saw it attempt to interfere with the Balkan Wars, in favour of its Slavic siblings.
However, in 1914 the Great War saw the strong but unprepared Russiaball suffer many wounds at the Masurian Lakes and Tannenburg battles. It had more luck during Osowiec, where the German's suffered heavy losses after the attack of the dead men, and also during the East invasion of Prussia, which resulted in an undecided outcome.
It was also more successful against the incompetent Austria-Hungaryball, invading its Galicia clay, as well as Ottomanball trying to invade it in winter, and held the front at a heavy cost for two years, until something inside it snapped in 1917.
From March 8 to March 16, 1917, it had a personality change, resulting in it becoming a republican ball, but its child Bolshevikball was still fed up and used its parent's weak state to murder it and take its place on November 7, 1917 during the October Revolution. It became R.S.F.S.Rball that year, and later after the Russian Civil War Soviet Unionball in 1922.
- USAball - I sold Alaska to it. We were warm neutral, but still really good friends. Both served in numerous wars together, stopped the Russo-Japanese War, and more. We've had a down in 1903-1905 but even still, we are very good friends. I’m very sorry that my child and Grandchild both hate you so much. Other than that, we both hate Vladimir Lenin, Leon Trotsky, and Joseph Stalin.
- Austrian Empireball - I help it in its wars and it supports me too. But we had to be at war in WW1, sadly... And also an ally against that kebab.
- Franceball - Forced me into surrender on occasion. But was defeated by glorious Russia! Then we teamed up against the German Empireball. BUT NEVER FORGET THAT WAR!
- UKball - Fought it in the Crimea with Franceball. Then we teamed up against the German Empireball.
- Union of South Africaball - I had good relations with it when it was a Dominion of the British Empire. I also had close military relations with it and I like the Boers.
- Armeniaball - Kept a bit of its clay around as secret weapon against kebab. May it pay for what it did to you. Presently the only clay Armeniaball has left.
- Ethiopian Empireball - Fellow Eastern Orthodox sibling that hates the UK. I also helped it during the first Ethio-Italian war. We are also good trading partners. Sadly, its emperor was also murdered by the EVIL REDS.
- Kingdom of Romaniaball, Kingdom of Bulgariaball and Kingdom of Serbiaball - I freed them from Ottoman Empireball.
- Republic of Cubaball - You are the real Cuba. Sadly those evil Communists also killed you as well in 1959. But that was 42 years later or nearly 2 generations later.
- German Empireball- We almost had an alliance in 1905. Our leaders are cousins btw.
- Kingdom of Italyball- We are good friends and I like you very much. Thank you for fighting the evil Reds. But leave Abyssinia alone plox!!
- Finlandball - My child who likes me for giving independence. Also, both remove tomato communism.
- Congress Polandball - My other child who tried to escape home in 1830 and 1863. You helped a bit in 1914.
- Alaskaball - Also my child whom I'm sorry about for selling it. Good thing 'Merica protected it from tomato vodka.
- Belarusball/ Byelorussian SSRball - It is my cute child! After Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealthball finally died, I adopted it. It cried a lot when I was killed/murdered. I miss you too my sweet child!
- Anti-Communismball - I super agree with you 100%. Please, don't forget what first happened here in 1917, we will help you against the evil Reds.
- White Movementballs - Thank you for preserving my legacy and fighting against the Reds (although you did kind of bad I appreciate the effort).
- Empire of Japanball - Damn you! 1905! Never Forget! Manchuria and especially Korea were rightfully mine! But we both became allies in WWI and you helped me against that fucking peasant that destroyed my legacy so I can forgive you, I guess?
- Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealthball - Sure, We had common enemies (Ahem, Swedish Empire, Nationalist Kebab), but you somehow managed to hold Moscowball for 2 years and then got partitioned.
- Rasputin - I appreciate your helping my tsar's son, but you're still a degenerate lunatic. Please stop ruining my reputation.
- Swedish Empireball - My pathetic enemy that I defeated in 1721. LOL you're pathetic and I hope you die.
- Ottoman Empireball - My rival, one which I usually defeated easily. I always wanted to anschluss its capital to restore Byzantineball. Not to mention, this asshole committed genocide against Armenians.
- German Empireball - We used to be friends. Our Leaders were cousins! You wouldn't have won if it weren't for the REDS!
- Qingball - Manchuria is mine! 1911 best year!!!
- SLAVE LOVER - YUO FUCKING DIXIE PIG! YOU ONLY SUCCEEDED BECAUSE YUO JUST LIKE SLAVERY! YOU DID NOT BECAUSE OF STATES RIGHTS, FUCKING CYKA! AND THEN YOU GO AHEAD AND DECLARE WAR ON MY FRIEND AND BLAMED THE WAR ON IT!?! UNACCEPTABLE! I WILL SUPPORT THE NORTH, ALSO YOU WANTED THE POLISH NATIONAL GOVERNMENT TO JOIN YOU BECAUSE THEY SUPPORTED YOU! IN 1865 NEVER FORGET! REMOVE SLAVERY! REMOVE DIXIE!
- Switzerlandball - Stop gibbing Lenin refuge! Throw the idiot man into a prison, the bastard.
- Communismball - Stop revolution!! Stop revolting!! Remove Vladimir Lenin! You're hampering our war effort!
- Russian SFSRball - Communist child who rebelled against me and later murdered me in 1917 because I had starved it.
- Soviet Unionball - False communist successor to me and my child! Remove Lenin!! Remove Trotsky, and Remove Stalin!! Remove the Reds! Remove Soviet and Remove Communism!
- Russiaball - You Traitor! You are just like your evil, monstrous and totalitarian Parent Sovietball!! You still follow its policies!!
- Estoniaball - My child who hates me, because I killed it in 1896 using stampede, I did not mean it! Also it says I'm responsable for my child and my grandchild existing. Look, It's not my fault okay? (cries)
- Lithuaniaball - Another child who hates me, but this time, it hates me for no reason. (why)
| Union of Soviet Socialist Republics: Lаnd оf |
|Principal republics||Armenian SSRball • Azerbaijan SSRball • Byelorussian SSRball • Georgian SSRball • Kazakh SSRbrick • Kirghiz SSRball • Russian SFSRball • Tajik SSRball • Turkmen SSRball • Ukrainian SSRball • Uzbek SSRball|
|Post-World War II|| Estonian SSRball • Latvian SSRball • Lithuanian SSRball • Moldavian SSRball • |
|Short-lived||Karelo-Finnish SSRball • Transcaucasian SFSRball|
|Not union republics||SSR Abkhaziaball • Bukharan PSRball • Khorezm SSRball • Pridnestrovian Moldavian SSRball|
| Republic of |
|Brestball • Gomelball • Grodnoball • Mogilevball • Minskball ( Minskball [capital]) • Vitebskball|
|Migrants from West (Prehistoric Europeans) • Slavsball • Dregovichsball • Kyivan Rusball • Grand Duchy of Lithuaniaball • Poland-Lithuaniaball • Russian Empireball • Belarusian People's Republicball • Belarusian Central Councilball • Byelorussian SSRball|
|Is proud to be Europe's last dictatorship.|
|Counties||Alytusball • Kaunasball • Klaipėdaball • Marijampolėball • Panevėžysball • Šiauliaiball • Tauragėball • Telšiaiball • Utenaball • Vilnius Countyball ( Vilniusball) • Samogitiaball|
|Former entities||Migrants from East (Prehistoric Europeans)• Grand Duchy of Lithuaniaball • Polish-Lithuanian Commonwealthball • Republic of Lithuaniaball (1918-40) • Lithuanian SSRball ( Reichskommissariat Ostlandball)|
|Regions||Rigaball • Kurzemeball • Latgaleball • Zemgaleball • Vidzemeball|
|Former entities||Migrants from the East (Prehistoric Europeans) • Duchy of Lithuaniaball • Kingdom of Lithuaniaball • Grand Duchy of Lithuaniaball • Poland-Lithuaniaball • Russian Empireball • Republic of Latviaball (1918-40) • Latvian SSRball • Reichskommissariat Ostlandball • Latvian SSRball ( Soviet Unionball)|
|Counties||Harjuball ( Tallinnball) • Hiiuball • Ida-Viruball • Jõgevaball • Järvaball • Lääneball • Lääne-Viruball • Põlvaball • Pärnuball • Raplaball • Saareball • Tartuball • Valgaball • Viljandiball • Võruball|
|Former entities||Migrants from the East (Ancient Finnics) • Terra Marianaball • Danish Estoniaball • Duchy of Estoniaball (1561-1721) • Governorate of Estoniaball • United Baltic Duchyball • Reichskommissariat Ostlandball • Estonian SSRball ( Soviet Unionball)|
|Can I into Nordic?|
| The Rəpublic of Azərbaycan: |
|Rəgions||Abshəronballl (Bakuball) • Ganja-Qazakhball • Shaki-Zaqatalaball • Lankaranball • Quba-Khachmazball • Aranball • Yukhari-Karabakhball • Kalbajar-Lachinball • Daglig-Shirvanball|
|SOON!||Tabrizball • Urmiaball|
|Formər əntitiəs||Migrants from South (Prəhistoric Əuropəans) • Ibəriaball • Caucasian Albaniaball • SPQRball • Parthiaball • Sassanidball • Persiaball • Transcaucasiaball • Transcaucasian SFSRball • Azərbaycani SSRball ( Soviətball)|
|Regions||Akmolabrick • Aktobebrick • Almatybrick ( Almatybrick) • Arkalykbrick • Atyraubrick • Baikonurbrick • East Kazakhbrick • Ekibastuzbrick • Jambylbrick • Karagandabrick • Kostanaybrick • Kyzylordabrick • Mangystaubrick ( Aktaubrick) • North Kazakhbrick • Nur-Sultanbrick • Pavlodarbrick • Turkistanbrick • West Kazakhbrick|
|Former entities||Migrants from South (Steppe Peoples) • Scythiaball • Hunball • Rouran Khaganateball • Gokturkball • Qarlukidsball • Kimek Khanateball • Oghuz Yabguball • Kara-Khanidball • Qara Khitaiball • Mongol Empireball • Golden Hordeball ( White Hordeball) • Chagataiball • Moghulistanball • Uzbek Khanateball • Nogai Hordeball • Kazakh Khanatebrick • Russian Empireball ( Russian Turkestanball) • Turkestan Autonomyball • Alash Autonomybrick • ( Turkestan ASSRball • Kirghiz ASSRbrick • Kazakh ASSRbrick) • ( Kazakh SSRbrick)|
|I can into #1 exporter of potassium but REMOVE BORAT!!!|
|Regions||Batkenball • Chuyball • Issyk Kulball • Jalal-Abadball • Narynball • Oshball • Talasball|
|Federal Cities||Bishkekball • Oshball|
|Former entities||Migrants from South • Seleucidball • Sassanidball • Umayyadball • Samanid Empireball • Seljuk Empireball • Abbasidball • Qara Khitaiball • Khwarazmian dynastyball • Mongol Empireball • Chagatai Khanateball • Moghulistanball • Timurid Empireball • Western Moghulistanball • Khanate of Bukharaball • Emirate of Bukharaball • Khanate of Kokandball • Qingball • Russian Empireball ( Russian Turkestanball) • Turkestan ASSRball • Kara-Kirghiz Autonomous Oblastball • Soviet Unionball ( Kirghiz SSRball)|